I watched the movie "Like Water for Chocolate" on SBS last night. I read the book a few years ago, but this post wont be a rant about the differences between the book and the movie - I actually liked them both.
It's a very sensual, sad, passionate story of a young girl, Tita, who is forbidden from marrying her true love, Pedro. Instead, Pedro marries her older sister in order to be close to her. Tita uses food to express herself - and she is able to show her love for him through her cooking. The connection between Tita and Pedro is like fire, but at the end of the day, it's kinda fucked up because Tita is in a situation where she's in love with, and having sex with, her sister's husband and there's nothing they can do to change that situation.
At one point, Tita goes slightly mad, but is nursed back to health by the very sweet and gentle young doctor, John, who falls in love with her.
Anyway, my problem with the story, is that I just didn't like her apparent "soulmate" Pedro. In fact, there was something downright annoying and whiny about him. I'm sure they had great sex and all of that, but I actually would've married the doctor, John. Sure he wasn't as gorgeous and sensual and sexy as Pedro, but he was a good person. He was willing to forgive her for sleeping with Pedro, he was gentle, patient, understanding, intelligent and kind. At least with him, Tita would've had the chance to have a normal life and family, instead of waiting with burning heart for her Pedro to sweep her into a loved-up frenzy.
I dunno. To me, it's better to have "good enough" with John and live a good life with him, than to wait around for Pedro and feel completely fucked up about it.
Or course, that would probably make the story not quite as good - not quite the proper tragic romance. But really, who wants to live in a tragic romance?
At the end of the day, I think most women would agree with me. Sometimes you just have to tell the "Pedros" of this world that if they can't give you what you need, they're making life too difficult, and besides, you deserve better than to be someone's mistress. And then you'd settle for a nice "John" who feels safe and comfortable, and who tries his best.
It's a great book/movie, btw, if you haven't seen it. And stories are about suspending one's belief.
So in real life, Tita might probably marry John and just let Pedro be a nice memory, but in a story, she'd do anything, absolutely anything, to be with her true love.
14 comments:
Wow.
I could hold forth on this for hours, but your perspective is interesting.
It's the true love vs. stupidity situation to me. Sure, I want a man to want me more than anybody else...pine for me...forego other women for me...and then when we date, it'll be great knowing he wanted me that badly. But just for the record, if the guy *I* want so badly marries my sister, we're done.
I just haven't lived in the South long enough to take the whole "screwing my sibling's significant other" concept and run with it. Not only that, but I'm not an adultress. Oh, and I deserve a man who is only screwing me.
Sometimes we have a Pedro in our lives, and it hurts, and it takes a while to get over him. Then we do, and we find out that John just is soooo much better that we wonder why we ever gave Pedro a second glance. It takes letting go of Pedro, however, to find true happiness.
No shit, Jez and Kira. I'd go for John in a heartbeat. Pedros are nothing but trouble. But then again, I'm old and haggard. In my wild youth, I'd have been all about Pedro. Age and wisdom have opened my eyes to the benefits of John.
Pedros are fun for flings, but Johns are the ones you want forever.
One day I'm gonna watch this one.
(I keep getting the title mixed up with "The Wedding Banquet", for some unknown bloody reason.)
Pedros are all well and good, but if you end up getting your Pedro, someone still has to take out the garbage. I suspect the John would be a much better bet for that!
And I don't share. I'm worth a helluva lot more than that.
I never had my Pedro, but I love my John. He's a good man. Now Pedro's in prison. Guess I made the right choice!
Hey Super Girl - just wanted to say Hi and tell you that you and your Hub are in my prayers. jk
- Hey, why's every one dissing me? I'm a nice guy, I take out the trash. I mean, sure, I'm a cad, and a whiner, but what's that among family and friends? Wahh.
Lol@ pedro.
If I felt that strongly for pedro, I think I'd be very reluctant to go for John. Not because I couldn't see that John is better, but because I'd feel guilty that I didn't have the same passion for him.
I couldn't accept a relationship (in theory) where I was always thinking about someone else.
Having said that, I'm sure in a short space of time, John could make me forget the doomed passion of pedro, and make me appreciate the quiet presence of someone who actually cares about you enough to not marry your sister (go kira!)
NWJR - okay, and I'd love to know what you really think.
kira - agreed. Although to give him some credit, Pedro only married the sister because Tita's mother wouldn't allow her to be married. Pedro just wanted to be close to her. But still. As she says "I'd rather you have kidnapped me" than have to live in the situation they found themselves in.
Laura - you're onto something there. There's a difference in what we want when we're younger and what we want when we realise that real life is hard and what's most important is someone who'll support us through thick and thin.
Amanda - yep - that's the way to put it. I do believe it's the same deal from a guy's perspective too - the type of girl they'd only date vs. the type of girl they'd want to marry. It's the whole Veronica/Betty thing from their point of view.
DMcG - you'll like it. It made me very hungry. And the book has recipes - bliss!
ginchy - sharing isnt fun. And yes, I value a man who does all the things about the house!
Juanita - hmmm, yes you did make the right choice!
Jill - *hugs* - hope all is well, hon. x Thank you.
Pedro - you're dead, remember? It's a total spoiler for me to say this, but you die at the end because you finally get to be with Tita and being with her makes you feel too much. You get to sleep with her and shout out how much you love her and there's so much burning inside of you that it kills you. You light all of the matches within you all at once and no one can cope with burning like that.
Fudge - you are wise, my dear. But yes, the quiet presence of someone who cares is good.
oh yeah, i'm dead - there *is* that. all the matches at once? yikes, that'll leave a mark. okay, it's a pisser, then, but i blame society - and my parents. i was harshly toilet-trained, and mother withheld her love and affection. uh huh, that's it. but wow, dead, huh? i guess i *can't* take out the garbage, but at least i've got a good excuse this time. cheers.
If it's true love and Pedro married you sister to be close to you I feel badly for the sister.
If it is infatuation it will wear off and the sister will win her man back.
I agree. Infatuation burns out all too soon.
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