Sunday evening.
This morning a couple of Jehowah's witness came knocking at my door to tell me about the end being nigh, and I got thinking. Not about anything to do with Jehowah or his witnesses, but about those religions where men have multiple wives.
I mean, how does it all work? Does he say to wife No. 1 "It's time for a new wife, you're getting saggy"? And how does the first wife deal with some new young chick in the household getting all the attention? Do they take turns in the bed with the man?
At school, we learnt about cults in Studies of Religion and I remember seeing a video of some woman who shared her husband with three other girls. She said "I'd rather have 25% of a 100% man, than 100% of a 25% man".
Gawd, I just would rather have 100% of a man.
And he doesn't need to be perfect, he just needs to try his best.
There is no fricken way I could stand some younger chick vying for my Hubby's attention. She would have to beware my wrath.
I know in some cultures the women don't get a choice in these matters, but I do not understand the women who willingly allow themselves to be one of many wives.
Don't we all want to cleave to just the one person in every way - head, heart and soul - okay, and genitals? Is there room for anyone else in that mix?
7 comments:
HBO has a series about a bigamist family called "Big Love". I haven't been able to get into it...apparently it's very good. All I remember is the promo where the husband climbs into one wife's bed and she complains "but I switched with Jan tonight"!
Well, one thing I've learned is that different people can take different things. I can't share, myself. Nobody touches Alex except me. However, my good friend Kelly from my uni days has an "open marriage" with her husband, and they've been happy that way for 12 or so years. I will never forget her excitedly telling me that it's so great because when one of them goes out on a date, the other can watch the kids. You don't even have to hunt up a babysitter! Not exactly what I'd want, myself, but it seems to make them happy.
While the male ego may get "stoked" over the concept, it's the non-bed time that would scare the shit out of me!
For example who do you side with as to the level of spicing in the food, the proper level of starch in the shirts, or (shudder) who decides what program to watch on the television, or what CD or radio station when in the car, or,...
NO way!! One woman, one man it's plenty for me!
I know a couple of couples who are open, but not to the extent of being married, or even truly developing a serious relationship.
I think that people have different levels of control over their libidos (I'm damn proud to say I'm a monogamist), and there are several people I know, male and female, where the only way they'd truly be happy in a long-term relationship would be if it was an open relationship.
In my view, polygamy isn't necessarily a sin, but it has to be entered into with the agreement of both parties. I think that you and your partner define the parameters of your relationship, and not society, and as long as both partners are equally represented, I'm down with that.
I used to joke around that I was going to create my own religion where women got to have more than one husband. Other married women would always say, "How would you keep more than one of them satisfied?" Now, back then, the thought intrigued and even delighted me. But now, many years later, I think monogamy is quite comforting, and it's really nice to settle into bed with the same person every night.
Here, we have what I guess is a different version of people who witness door-to-door. According to my grandma on my mom's side, Jehoviah's witnesses made her mom give up fighting when she was sick because they made her question her faith. She died the day after a visit with them. So, ever since I was a little girl, they have creeped me out.
One of the guys I work with... and whom I used to have an enormous crush on... is also a practitioner of that faith, and he's one of the nicest, friendliest, most (...errr...) innocent people I've ever met. Innocent to the point of naïve in some aspects of modern society, I think, but I supposed being coddled in one's faith makes the evils of the world a lot easier to cope with. 'tis the point of religion, no, to give the seemingly inexplicable a supernatural bent in order to make it more palatable to the minds of we mere mortals? Personally, I think it's a bit of an intellectual crutch, but I'm not going to judge people too harshly.
Anyhoo... he's never once tried to convert me or preach the evils of gay queer homosexual faggot bumsecks (after five years of semi-voluntary celibacy, I doubt I'm at risk of going to hell for partaking of sodomy); never tried to "save my soul" (perhaps I'm beyond all redemption?), quite freely discusses his own faith when asked (because I remain forever curious about faith and religions), and has been known to provide some of the most intellectually stimulating conversation I've ever had at work. For a secular anarchist to really get down and thinky with One Of The Devout is truly an act of God. Or Science. Or Politics. Or Something. In short, he's never forced his religious beliefs on me, and I appreciate that.
Hammering on the door and saying "THE WORLD IS GOING TO END! REPENT! REEEEPEEEEENTTTT!" is about as far from that as you can get, I figure.
Not sure why I decided to spiel that in your general direction, but thereyago.
*slinks off, freshly unloaded*
You've probably read all about my living in a JW house. I think they got the idea pretty early on that I was a lost cause and didn't try it on with us.
Polygamy, totally not the way to go for me. One is definately enough.
Post a Comment