One of the things that no one ever tells you is that it's okay to be
sad sometimes.
It's okay to feel really depressed when things go wrong or not the way we plan.
It's perfectly normal.
Not even just that.
It's necessary.

It's an important process that helps us grow up out of being selfish
little young adults - all party, party, party, me, me, me - and into
"proper grown-ups" with a true perspective of the importance of life.

But we live in a world where people try to find a way to fix things
for you – where someone, somewhere has some magic way of making all
your problems go away.

But that's no way to live.
It's no way of facing - and learning from - your problems.

So unless you have an actual clinical problem (in which your reaction
to something does not correspond to the magnitude of your problem, or
in which the reaction does not diminish normally with time) it's
always important to remember that life can be sad and sometimes we get
depressed.

Feeling depressed when things aren't going well *is* normal. We are
*supposed* to feel depressed when things happen that are beyond our
control.

But that doesn't mean we should ever lose sight of the things we have
that are truly wonderful.

Like the soft, sweet breath of my husband when he's sleeping, snuggled
against me.
Like the potent perfume of the vermillion rose that just came into
bloom in my garden.
Like the squawk of the cockatoos as they fly overhead at sunset each
day, while I float in my pool at stare up at the sky.

There's this happy/sad feeling – I don't know how else to describe it
– where you can be sad about something and happy about another thing.
Sad about the things that don't work out and happy about the things that do.
Sad about losing that sense of freedom and little responsibility that
goes with the early 20s, and happy that I'm finding my own voice.
Sad about losing some relationships and happy about gaining others.
Sad about continual new worries and happy about the wonderful family
and lovely friends with lots of support.

That's how I've been feeling a lot lately.
Happy/sad.
It's not a bad way to feel.